my_daroga: Orson Welles (orson)
my_daroga ([personal profile] my_daroga) wrote2013-10-10 09:30 pm
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on the fact all the fanfiction I've posted today is ancient

Somehow, I've convinced myself I'm not a writer. I used to write all the time. I used to even post stuff I'd written! And I haven't in years, except for roleplay, which is writing, but dependent on others playing along. Which can be a great thing, motivationally, and a bad thing.

So today, in an effort to jumpstart my creative engines, I posted a bunch of old stuff to AO3 that I guess I didn't feel qualified as fic, or wasn't done/good enough/ready. I know that those pieces won't ever be, and I thought maybe if I put it out there, I'd inspire myself again. So the Phantom and Star Trek stuff that went up today is all old. In one case, almost ten years old. So the person who wrote that is no longer the person I am, but I still think I had some nifty stuff to say. And maybe someone will enjoy it, or be inspired to write their own response.

The Trek stuff I posted is all more or less flashback/metafic about Kirk, based on stuff that was developing through the roleplay I was part of. Things were coming out in play that might not necessarily reflect my view of canon, but were nonetheless takes I hadn't seen before on Jim Kirk. So those are there, too.

I want to write more. I just have no idea how to do it anymore, and I'm not even sure why that is. I've honestly convinced myself I have no ideas in my head, which is inconsistent with the fact I apparently want to write. So something's blocking me pretty hard.

So if you've ever been in this position? What do you do? Prompt communities? I am interested in way too many things at the moment to be able to narrow down my interest long enough to think of a premise. I think I need to set some artificial barriers. And keep reminding myself it doesn't have to be good/done/epic/amazing right off. Somehow, I got into that mentality as well, the one where I have to know what the end point is in order to act. I've been getting a LOT better at not living that way, and it's turned out all right for me so far. So it's time to apply it to writing, again. If I can narrow my attention long enough to know where to begin.